The Land of Living Stones

What better time to write on my blog than when I am in the midst of what could certainly be considered my biggest meltdown to date? Maybe it will seem trivial, but the collision of several factors has culminated in my present state of mind. First, I’m pretty sick, gastro-intestinal nasty business. I don’t know why, and I hope it goes away soon. I’m tired of hanging out near the bathroom. Secondly, and likely to remain a problem, is that I don’t have my own laptop. My biggest regret is not bringing my computer with me. I was under the impression that I’d have plenty of access but this is not the case. At the center where I am two days a week, there is a desktop I can use that still uses Windows ME and can’t open PDF or Flash (or any Word doc from a newer addition.) The director informed me yesterday that they cannot afford to buy one for me, which is understandable, so I will have to wait. Just now, inspiring my gloom, Femke told me she doesn’t want me to use her personal laptop, which is also understandable. But this means that she can access a computer and the net every day on her work laptop and then come home and use the wireless on her own laptop every night.

Petty, perhaps, but the reality is that I feel quite distressed by not having a computer around, especially because the internet is available and most all of my colleagues have continuous access to laptops (The MCCers, Femke, all the workers at the Center). So, it’s expected that you can check your email and stay in contact. The worst is that my own laptop is sitting at home, with all my music on it, and I could have brought it! If anyone happens to be traveling to/from the East Coast and to/from Israel/Palestine/Jordan  PLEASE let me know!!! I would love to get my computer!

Lastly, I still feel uncertain about my place in the organization. Things have been slow to progress as far as how I can assist in the school and that which is most desired, English teaching, is something I feel completely inadequate at doing. If anyone knows of good resources for teaching kids and/or adults English and could send me the links or send me some materials, I would be eternally grateful. I have to write an annual plan for mid-October, and there is a week of holiday next week for the end of Ramadan so I hope I will have a clue what to say.

If only I could stop crying. And pull myself together. Thanks for reading and praying and supporting me!